it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
