i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
