i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
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If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
i believe in u and ur pee
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
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