Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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