LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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