The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
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