..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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