it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
