God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Just high enough for therapy.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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