no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Randomize
