Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Randomize
