We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
