C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
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