haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
