BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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