In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
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