in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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