I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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