I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Where is the hickey?
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
23 Parents Gave Awful Advice about “The Birds and the Bees”
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
These 19 Deaths Are Ironically Hilarious
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.