bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize