I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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