Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize