Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
