Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Randomize
