someone owes me an orgasm
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Randomize
