Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Randomize