Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
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