I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Randomize
