I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Randomize
