she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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