I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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