I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
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