yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
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