For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Randomize
