so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
