Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize