I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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