some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
We have started to decorate penises.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
