i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
