I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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