I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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