I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
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