I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
You smell like stripper and shame
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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