If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Randomize
