apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
