Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Randomize
