Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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