don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize