Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
