sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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