well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
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