just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
of course. lets lasso hookers.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
