he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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